CTRL+ALT+DESIRE is a three-part docuseries, directed by Colin Archdeacon, that explores the case of Grant Amato; in 2019, he murdered his parents, Chad and Margaret, and his older brother Cody. Archdeacon had extensive communication with Amato over four years, and Amato’s very normal-seeming demeanor and voice are heard throughout the docuseries, currently streaming on Paramount+.
CTRL+ALT+DESIRE: STREAM IT OR SKIP IT?
Opening Shot: A man taking a selfie video, where he says “Cody, you have to do this.”
The Gist: Grant and Cody Amato were very close, to the point where Grant strangely admits to Archdeacon that his older brother was “the love of my life.” They even went into the same field, as anesthetic nurses. After he was booted out of the training program for that specialty, then fired from a different job as a general-practice nurse, Grant became isolated and despondent. He eventually found a cam site, and ended up falling for a cam girl in Bulgaria named Silviya Ventsislavova, who called herself “Silvie” in the personal communication the two of them had.
As he got more involved with Silvie, he got more and more in debt as he paid her an increasing number of “tokens” in order to stay one of her top followers. But his once-close relationship with his parents and brother deteriorated as a result. Eventually, his parents and brother staged an intervention and sent him to a rehab facility. But it’s when he came back that all hell broke loose.
What Shows Will It Remind You Of? CTRL+ALT+DESIRE shows the other side of the “cam girl” industry, which we saw in documentaries like A Cam Life.
Our Take: Even though Archdeacon speaks to journalists, cops, prosecutors and even a friend of Grant Amato’s for CTRL+ALT+DESIRE, the series hinges on the access Amato gave Archdeacon. The footage and audio from the various interviews he did with Archdeacon, paired with his police interrogation footage and some of the videos he created show a guy who looks and sounds thoroughly normal. Heck, he even starts discussing the murder of his family with the cops as if this was something he saw on the news.
Archdeacon uses some reenactments and some visual effects to amp up the drama of the story, but we’re not sure that was completely necessary. Despite Amato’s phlegmatic disposition, his words reveal the life of a person whose mental health was always a bit, well, off. Yes, that’s not exactly a clinical description of what was going on with him. But Archdeacon does a good job of using Amato’s own words to paint a picture of how the descent into isolation and depression that fueled his obsession with Silvie didn’t exactly come from out of the blue.
One of the things we wish we heard more of in the first episode is how a person could disconnect the fantasy of falling for someone like Silvie with the reality that it’s a transactional relationship in the most literal sense of the term. It happens all the time; we wouldn’t be surprised if cam girls or OnlyFans models have to juggle “personal” relationships with multiple fans at one time. There has to be a combination of various dysfunctions going on for someone to think a relationship with a cam girl living on a different continent can be close to something real, to the point where people go into severe debt to buy their attention.
You get a hint of Grant Amato’s particular kind of dysfunction as he talks about his relationship with his older brother — whom he murdered, by the way — like it was a romantic relationship. When the first words in that vein come from Grant, our instinct was to look over at our SO and say, “did he just say that?” It feels strange and unbelievable, and the discomfort that it generates is what makes the narrative of this true crime story so compelling.
Sex and Skin: Silvie is a top cam girl on the site she was on for a reason, as we see in the clips of some of her videos. Nothing explicit, but she certainly knew what she was doing.
Parting Shot: As someone calls in a welfare check on Cody Amato after he doesn’t come into work, cops surround the Amatos’ Florida home and go inside.
Sleeper Star: Jared Shapiro, a public defender in Seminole County, seems particularly disdainful of Grant Amato, saying he lived with “mommy and daddy” and other similar statements. You’d think he worked for the district attorney, he’s so dismissive of Amato.
Most Pilot-y Line: One of Grant’s friends, “Mary”, is seen from behind; her voice is disguised. Who she is to Grant is undefined, but Archdeacon makes sure to show her being very uncomfortable and twitchy in the chair, shaking her legs and being seemingly in pain. It’s distracting, and we’re not sure her interview gives any new insights.
Our Call: STREAM IT. Despite some missing context, Grant Amato’s strangely normal interview footage and audio effectively drives the narrative in CTRL+ALT+DESIRE.
Joel Keller (@joelkeller) writes about food, entertainment, parenting and tech, but he doesn’t kid himself: he’s a TV junkie. His writing has appeared in the New York Times, Slate, Salon, RollingStone.com, VanityFair.com, Fast Company and elsewhere.
